Thursday, December 16, 2010
I need staff.
As I try to get 1001 things ready for Christmas from kid gifts for parties, permission slips, baking etc. I have come to the conclusion that I need to hire staff. The first position I am considering adding is "put stuff where is belongs picker upper" This is an 8 hour a day task for following around the 3 yr old alone. Just when you think all the random stuff is put away, you find a stash of treasures. Now, being a bit of a "collector" (which we all know is a polite word for hoarder) I sympathize with Madaleine's need to do this but, my type A part needs order desperately. If only...
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Is it OCD or is it a hobby?
Sometimes I can't decipher if my hobbies are actually hobbies or my OCD tendencies to hoard and collect craft items. All my poor, must have, 12x12 paper is not getting to see the light of day, my beads, well, they are neglected. Only jostled around when I need a quick cute gift cranked out. I am not sure what I was thinking with the spools and spools of ribbon... sigh, I have a problem.
The time to make resolutions is upon us, since I have no desire to do the standards of diet and exercise as a declaration of sorts, I resolve to use my craft stuff. Handmade gifts next year people. Be prepared and you should let me know what colors you prefer so I don't have to guess. If you are really nice you may get some L'bri Lotion too... :)
Now to finish clearing off the craft table of the junk that has collected over the last year and get busy...
The time to make resolutions is upon us, since I have no desire to do the standards of diet and exercise as a declaration of sorts, I resolve to use my craft stuff. Handmade gifts next year people. Be prepared and you should let me know what colors you prefer so I don't have to guess. If you are really nice you may get some L'bri Lotion too... :)
Now to finish clearing off the craft table of the junk that has collected over the last year and get busy...
Dusting off the blog...
Whew, it's been a long time... Since I have drastically cut back on FB time, it's time to resserect the blog! So much has happened since the last post but I don't remember what! New beginnings.
Friday, August 7, 2009
Should it take 3 hours to mop?
Three hours is not a normal amount of time it should take to mop the floors but that is just what happened today...
It all started because the older kids were going to be gone for the afternoon thru dinner and it was close to the baby's nap time. The floor was trashed as usual and Madaleine sealed the deal when she dumped her mac n cheese on the floor. I figured since the kids were gone, I could clean it quickly and it would stay clean for longer that 5 minutes because they weren't there to dump things on it. I am hoping for at least 15 hours or so. Although it's raining so that may be a bit of a lofty goal anyhow.
Before they left I asked the kids to pull all the chairs out of the dining room and kitchen and pick up rugs. While they were doing that I started wiping down all the counters and wondered why there was toast crumbs everywhere when we didn't have toast. I loaded the dishwasher- actually unloaded the reloaded to be precise and got it running. Then I sent them downstairs to pick up all the stuff on the floor so I could do those too. Two minutes later I had to call them back down and find out why only 1/2 the pillows were picked up by the child who was told to do so... "I only picked up the ones that I put on the floor. I didn't do take down the rest so why should I pick them up?" Insert 5 minute speech here about doing it because I told her to and that I do plenty of cleaning up of messes I didn't make and would she like to start doing more...
Time for the "helpers" to go... Time for the serious quick mopping so I could do something "fun" while they are gone like bead or scrapbook or play scrabble. In theory that is. Oh wait, where did the little hairy escape artist go? Yes, outside in the rain. I tripped over a couple hundred shoes that were supposed to be on the shoe shelf on the way in. closed all the doors that were left open by the older kids and turned on Clifford. (Note to self, we should really donate to PBS since we don't have cable available out here in the boonies.) It was almost time for bed but I just knew I could finish sweeping before then.
After I searched down the broom, I started to sweep and noticed that the laundry baskets were full and since they were in the way of mopping it was time to start a load of wash. When I went to get the rest from the chute, it was jammed and I had to go upstairs and smash it down with a hanger. While I was up there I noticed the cat box needed to be cleaned and thought I may as well do it so the floor could be swept after. I noticed an empty toothpaste box and made a mental note to find the toothpaste that was likely with the 2 yr old anything minty clepto. She has resorted to hijacking the toothpaste every chance she gets since I wised up and no longer keep gum in my purse. Then I came down, started the laundry and went to wash my hands... you guessed it, the soap was full of water but no soap and there were no towels. Took care of that and went back to sweeping. I went pick up the cat food bowls and noticed they had no food or water and the food bin was empty. Filled everything up and went to throw out the food bag and noticed that the garbage was almost full. So, off to get the rest of the garbage cans. I actually got done sweeping at this point and if you have ever tried to sweep up mac n cheese, you know this was not an easy task. Good thing there was enough debris to stick on the noodles to get them to roll. ( Don't judge it could be you next week.)
With sweeping done, I went to fill up my industrial sized mop bucket. It is kind of nostalgic, like the kind I used at McD's back in the day. Hey, I am no mopping slacker and I have the old name tag with the mop sticker on it to prove it. This is why this job really should be such a breeze, I am a pro. When I went to get the ammonia to do the floors I discovered that there was just a splash left in the bottle. So then I had to decide what else I could mix in there that wouldn't cause a caustic chemical reaction and make me pass out although by this point, I could use a nap. Finally found something that didn't have bleach in it and got ready to mop. Then I heard the washer beep that it was done so I went to switch the loads. Back to the mop but then I noticed that the toilet was not so fresh looking and why have a clean floor if the rest of the bathroom is gross so off to clean the bathrooms... who wanted that many bathrooms in the first place??? When I was done with that I realized that Madaleine should have been in bed and hour ago and she needed a new diaper. Bad. Off to bed for her and was rather jealous. Went to wash my hands in the closest bathroom and yes, no soap... Filled that up and decided to check them all this time. Then I decided to get the upstairs bathroom mopped first even though I was just up there taking Madaleine to bed. Should have brought the mop then too... Finally one room done. Before going down, I turned off all the lights the kids left on and headed down for the next room.
Down to the basement. Oh, I forgot to sweep that area. Back up for the broom and dustpan. Who then do I see coming down the steps? The escape artist. Apparently the door was not shut tight. "whatcha doing momma, moppin?" Back up the 2 flights of stairs and a very good click of the door and back to work.
At this point I considered changing the mop water because it was a bit icky but, remembered I was now out of all cleaners. I forged ahead but was feeling a bit hot and I don't do hot so I had to stop and turn the AC temp lower. Hey, I turned off those lights so it is a wash on the bill. The floors are done... victory. Now I just have to put all the chairs back, shake out the rugs before I put them back, switch the laundry, decide if the laundry is being put away today and decide what is for dinner.
I am going to print this out and hang it on the door so that when Louie comes home from work and asks if I enjoyed my kids free time I don't have to muster up the energy to speak. It will also prevent the dangerous question of what did you do today? I don't want to have to clean the floors again... :-)
It all started because the older kids were going to be gone for the afternoon thru dinner and it was close to the baby's nap time. The floor was trashed as usual and Madaleine sealed the deal when she dumped her mac n cheese on the floor. I figured since the kids were gone, I could clean it quickly and it would stay clean for longer that 5 minutes because they weren't there to dump things on it. I am hoping for at least 15 hours or so. Although it's raining so that may be a bit of a lofty goal anyhow.
Before they left I asked the kids to pull all the chairs out of the dining room and kitchen and pick up rugs. While they were doing that I started wiping down all the counters and wondered why there was toast crumbs everywhere when we didn't have toast. I loaded the dishwasher- actually unloaded the reloaded to be precise and got it running. Then I sent them downstairs to pick up all the stuff on the floor so I could do those too. Two minutes later I had to call them back down and find out why only 1/2 the pillows were picked up by the child who was told to do so... "I only picked up the ones that I put on the floor. I didn't do take down the rest so why should I pick them up?" Insert 5 minute speech here about doing it because I told her to and that I do plenty of cleaning up of messes I didn't make and would she like to start doing more...
Time for the "helpers" to go... Time for the serious quick mopping so I could do something "fun" while they are gone like bead or scrapbook or play scrabble. In theory that is. Oh wait, where did the little hairy escape artist go? Yes, outside in the rain. I tripped over a couple hundred shoes that were supposed to be on the shoe shelf on the way in. closed all the doors that were left open by the older kids and turned on Clifford. (Note to self, we should really donate to PBS since we don't have cable available out here in the boonies.) It was almost time for bed but I just knew I could finish sweeping before then.
After I searched down the broom, I started to sweep and noticed that the laundry baskets were full and since they were in the way of mopping it was time to start a load of wash. When I went to get the rest from the chute, it was jammed and I had to go upstairs and smash it down with a hanger. While I was up there I noticed the cat box needed to be cleaned and thought I may as well do it so the floor could be swept after. I noticed an empty toothpaste box and made a mental note to find the toothpaste that was likely with the 2 yr old anything minty clepto. She has resorted to hijacking the toothpaste every chance she gets since I wised up and no longer keep gum in my purse. Then I came down, started the laundry and went to wash my hands... you guessed it, the soap was full of water but no soap and there were no towels. Took care of that and went back to sweeping. I went pick up the cat food bowls and noticed they had no food or water and the food bin was empty. Filled everything up and went to throw out the food bag and noticed that the garbage was almost full. So, off to get the rest of the garbage cans. I actually got done sweeping at this point and if you have ever tried to sweep up mac n cheese, you know this was not an easy task. Good thing there was enough debris to stick on the noodles to get them to roll. ( Don't judge it could be you next week.)
With sweeping done, I went to fill up my industrial sized mop bucket. It is kind of nostalgic, like the kind I used at McD's back in the day. Hey, I am no mopping slacker and I have the old name tag with the mop sticker on it to prove it. This is why this job really should be such a breeze, I am a pro. When I went to get the ammonia to do the floors I discovered that there was just a splash left in the bottle. So then I had to decide what else I could mix in there that wouldn't cause a caustic chemical reaction and make me pass out although by this point, I could use a nap. Finally found something that didn't have bleach in it and got ready to mop. Then I heard the washer beep that it was done so I went to switch the loads. Back to the mop but then I noticed that the toilet was not so fresh looking and why have a clean floor if the rest of the bathroom is gross so off to clean the bathrooms... who wanted that many bathrooms in the first place??? When I was done with that I realized that Madaleine should have been in bed and hour ago and she needed a new diaper. Bad. Off to bed for her and was rather jealous. Went to wash my hands in the closest bathroom and yes, no soap... Filled that up and decided to check them all this time. Then I decided to get the upstairs bathroom mopped first even though I was just up there taking Madaleine to bed. Should have brought the mop then too... Finally one room done. Before going down, I turned off all the lights the kids left on and headed down for the next room.
Down to the basement. Oh, I forgot to sweep that area. Back up for the broom and dustpan. Who then do I see coming down the steps? The escape artist. Apparently the door was not shut tight. "whatcha doing momma, moppin?" Back up the 2 flights of stairs and a very good click of the door and back to work.
At this point I considered changing the mop water because it was a bit icky but, remembered I was now out of all cleaners. I forged ahead but was feeling a bit hot and I don't do hot so I had to stop and turn the AC temp lower. Hey, I turned off those lights so it is a wash on the bill. The floors are done... victory. Now I just have to put all the chairs back, shake out the rugs before I put them back, switch the laundry, decide if the laundry is being put away today and decide what is for dinner.
I am going to print this out and hang it on the door so that when Louie comes home from work and asks if I enjoyed my kids free time I don't have to muster up the energy to speak. It will also prevent the dangerous question of what did you do today? I don't want to have to clean the floors again... :-)
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Marrying a Wisconsin Girl
> Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had
> given their new wives duties.
>
>
>
> The first man had married a woman from Louisiana and
> bragged he had told his wife she was going to do all the
> dishes and house cleaning. He said it took a couple days but
> on the third day he came home to a clean house and the
> dishes were done.
>
>
>
> The second man had married a woman from Florida. He bragged
> he had given his wife orders that she was to do all the
> cleaning, dishes and the cooking. On the first day he
> didn't see any results, but the next day it was better.
> By the third day, his house was clean, the dishes were done
> and he had a huge dinner on the table.
>
>
>
> The third man married a girl from Wisconsin. He told her
> that her duties were to keep the house clean, dishes washed,
> lawn mowed, laundry washed and hot meals on the table for
> every meal. He said the first day he didn't see
> anything, the second day he didn't see anything but by
> the third day most of the swelling had gone down and he
> could see a little out of his left eye; enough to fix
> himself a bite to eat, load the dishwasher and telephone a
> landscaper.
>
>
>
> Gotta love those Wisconsin girls .....
>
>
> given their new wives duties.
>
>
>
> The first man had married a woman from Louisiana and
> bragged he had told his wife she was going to do all the
> dishes and house cleaning. He said it took a couple days but
> on the third day he came home to a clean house and the
> dishes were done.
>
>
>
> The second man had married a woman from Florida. He bragged
> he had given his wife orders that she was to do all the
> cleaning, dishes and the cooking. On the first day he
> didn't see any results, but the next day it was better.
> By the third day, his house was clean, the dishes were done
> and he had a huge dinner on the table.
>
>
>
> The third man married a girl from Wisconsin. He told her
> that her duties were to keep the house clean, dishes washed,
> lawn mowed, laundry washed and hot meals on the table for
> every meal. He said the first day he didn't see
> anything, the second day he didn't see anything but by
> the third day most of the swelling had gone down and he
> could see a little out of his left eye; enough to fix
> himself a bite to eat, load the dishwasher and telephone a
> landscaper.
>
>
>
> Gotta love those Wisconsin girls .....
>
>
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Looing back, looking ahead
Tis the season for reflection. Looking back on this year, I can't believe how fast days have gone by. The kids have grown in feet, not inches, the school year is flying by and we have a whole new year to look forward to. I am not one to set resolutions. Too much pressure! I like to take each day as it comes and make a to do list. Mini resolutions I guess. That is enough for me! Now if I can actually get those things done, that would be an improvement already!
Friday, December 19, 2008
Really?!? Bacon...
I have to wonder..
what a grown man not to be named (My dad) was thnking when he gave my sick son bacon while at his house. Now, I understand he didn't have me with him when I was sick as a child but, just plain common sense tells you, bacon is not a good choice when you have puked in the last 24 hours. I highly doubt that he would eat bacon in the same situation.
Thus my mantra that the first response to ANY request a child gives should be NO! Giving kids what they want is not always a good idea even if you feel sorry for them. Just ask the wall, the carpet and the dresser that had a side of bacon with chicken noodle soup on them. Notice I didn't say the garbage can next to the bed???
I'm not sure if I am more annoyed and the giving of bacon or that it is going to take me a bit to think bacon is a good thing to eat again. I am now regretting my lunch choice as well. After playing in the bacony cesspool on the floor, I am sure some of those germs have found their way into my system. I don't want to see my mexican chicken again. Please.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Love your state... even Wisconsin, in winter
This was sent to me by my friend Jill who lives in California. Her son wrote it for a creative writing assignment. I'm posting it as we brace for a foot or more of snow tonight. Maybe we all need to look at it from the eyes of a child... he will be jealous of the fun to be had!!! Anyone want to send them the snow??? She did send me a picture of some snow they have gotten on the mountains. I don't know that I feel too sorry for them though!
Wisconsin Poem
It' s Winter in Wisconsin
And the gentle breezes blow
Seventy miles an hour
At twenty-five below
Oh, how I love Wisconsin
When the snow's up to your butt
You take a breath of winter
And your nose gets frozen shut
Yes, the weather here is wonderful
So I guess I'll hang around
I could never leave Wisconsin
'Cause I'm frozen to the ground!!!
Wisconsin Poem
It' s Winter in Wisconsin
And the gentle breezes blow
Seventy miles an hour
At twenty-five below
Oh, how I love Wisconsin
When the snow's up to your butt
You take a breath of winter
And your nose gets frozen shut
Yes, the weather here is wonderful
So I guess I'll hang around
I could never leave Wisconsin
'Cause I'm frozen to the ground!!!
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Clean Fun
Jesus and Satan were having an on-going argument about who was better on the computer. They had been going at it for days, and frankly God was tired of hearing all the bickering.
Finally fed up, God said, 'THAT'S IT! I have had enough. I am going to set up a test that will run for two hours, and from those results, I will judge who does the better job.' So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away.
They moused.
They faxed.
They e-mailed.
They e-mailed with attachments.
They downloaded.
They did spreadsheets!
They wrote reports.
They created labels and cards.
They created charts and graphs.
They did some genealogy reports They did every job known to man.
Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency and Satan was faster than Hades.
Then, ten minutes before their time was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of course, the power went off.
Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the underworld.
Jesus just sighed.
Finally the electricity came back on, and each of them restarted their computers. Satan started searching frantically, screaming 'It's gone! It's all GONE! 'I lost everything when the power went out!' Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from the past two hours of work.
Satan observed this and became irate.
'Wait!' he screamed. 'That's not fair! He cheated! How come He has all His work and I don't have any?' God just shrugged and said,
'JESUS SAVES'
Finally fed up, God said, 'THAT'S IT! I have had enough. I am going to set up a test that will run for two hours, and from those results, I will judge who does the better job.' So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away.
They moused.
They faxed.
They e-mailed.
They e-mailed with attachments.
They downloaded.
They did spreadsheets!
They wrote reports.
They created labels and cards.
They created charts and graphs.
They did some genealogy reports They did every job known to man.
Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency and Satan was faster than Hades.
Then, ten minutes before their time was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of course, the power went off.
Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the underworld.
Jesus just sighed.
Finally the electricity came back on, and each of them restarted their computers. Satan started searching frantically, screaming 'It's gone! It's all GONE! 'I lost everything when the power went out!' Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from the past two hours of work.
Satan observed this and became irate.
'Wait!' he screamed. 'That's not fair! He cheated! How come He has all His work and I don't have any?' God just shrugged and said,
'JESUS SAVES'
Monday, December 8, 2008
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Snow is Fun?
Just a little glimpse of why I am not really a huge fan of snow. Yes, it is pretty and it covers all the ugly dead stuff underneath. I admit that. I love when the trees have an icy layer on them. What I do not love is the complete chaos that devours my house when it snows.
Take Monday for example, the kids first day back after nearly a week off for Thanksgiving. I was ready for them to go! At 6:00 AM, I get a phone call from the principle of the school saying school was delayed 2 hours, OK, at least it wasn't cancelled. That didn't stop the kids from getting up at the crack of dawn, hmmmm could it have been the phone ringing at 6:00AM? Or maybe it was the driveway being plowed. Or maybe they just wanted to go outside. Which they did. In pajamas.
We made it through breakfast with minimal tears and then we had to wait for 2 hours for that beautiful yellow bus. Of course the kids weren't happy that I made them stay in instead of getting all wet before school. Then came the question repeated at least 100 times in those 2 hours. Can we snowmobile? Ummm, NO!
A) That is Dads thing
B) You smell like fuel 2 seconds after it starts
C) I am not going out and freezing this early in the day -I have a whole alphabet of reasons not to go outside.
Finally, it is 9:45 AM and the bus will be there in 15 minutes. You would think they had all their gloves and gear ready to do. Not so much. Where is my ____?_______.... So after searching the depths of the 2x2 foot closet, they are all ready to go. Just 5 more minutes and the bus should be there. Only 5 minutes to behave and stay dry. Can you see where this is going?
Barely to the end of the driveway and Angelina has been hit with 2 snowballs that have rocks in them because the boys grabbed snow that was freshly plowed. So, I yelled chores that were going to be assigned for that from the front door and prayed the bus would come. Then I proceeded to lock the door so they couldn't get back in! I watched out the window as they got wetter, their backpacks got wet sitting in the driveway and someone got a face wash...
Finally, 5 minutes later than it should have been, the bus. The glorious bus. Now I had to make up 2 hours of time lost in my Monday routine. Snow is great...
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Brain Power
I am the part of the bird not in the sky. I can swin the ocean and still remain dry. What am I?
Last weeks answer-
A joke
Last weeks answer-
A joke
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Chicken, Not Turkey.
I know it's Thanksgiving but, I am going to write about chicken! A friend sent this and it made me smile! Enjoy.
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for change! The chicken wanted change!
JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.
HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.
SARAH PALIN: As a Mayor and Governor of Alaska I have fought against and stopped the good old boy chickens attempts to cross the road against God's will . It appears I have not fully succeeded. Where's my gun?
DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?
GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not.The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.
COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road with what is certainly weapons of mass destruction, perhaps nuclear. We must bomb the chicken before it attacks us and destroys our American way of life!
BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?
AL GORE: I invented the chicken.
JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.
AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.
DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems. OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life,I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.
ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe a chicken crossed the road, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road to verify the crossing.
BILL O'REILLY, FOX NEWS: Another left-wing chicken has crossed the road, probably looking for another government relocation handout. Get over it buddy, as far as I'm concerned, you're on your own.
NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.
PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.
DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.
GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for me.
BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.
ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.
BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2009, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2009. This new platform is much more stable and will never need to recross.
ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?
COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for change! The chicken wanted change!
JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.
HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.
SARAH PALIN: As a Mayor and Governor of Alaska I have fought against and stopped the good old boy chickens attempts to cross the road against God's will . It appears I have not fully succeeded. Where's my gun?
DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?
GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not.The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.
COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road with what is certainly weapons of mass destruction, perhaps nuclear. We must bomb the chicken before it attacks us and destroys our American way of life!
BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?
AL GORE: I invented the chicken.
JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.
AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.
DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems. OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life,I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.
ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe a chicken crossed the road, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road to verify the crossing.
BILL O'REILLY, FOX NEWS: Another left-wing chicken has crossed the road, probably looking for another government relocation handout. Get over it buddy, as far as I'm concerned, you're on your own.
NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.
PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.
DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.
GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for me.
BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.
ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.
BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2009, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2009. This new platform is much more stable and will never need to recross.
ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?
COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Ramen War
Just heard in my kitchen... "Conversation" Between Gabrielle and Jonathan.
"G -in tears" I didn't get to do anything to make the Ramen Noodles... You got to do like 10 steps. I only got to scrunch them. I want to scrunch them again and you already did it AND put them in the microwave. You even stirred them. I didn't get to do anything.
"J -with rolling eyes" Yes you did. You got to do the water and the packet and put them in the microwave. I didn't get to do anything.
Really, are there that many steps to make Ramen Noodles? I should have just made them myself. There wouldn't have been scrunched up noodles and flavor packet all over the kitchen. Why scrunch them? Isn't part of the fun of Ramen Noodles to eat a giant long noodle?
It's the little things that start the wars I guess. When do they go back to school?
"G -in tears" I didn't get to do anything to make the Ramen Noodles... You got to do like 10 steps. I only got to scrunch them. I want to scrunch them again and you already did it AND put them in the microwave. You even stirred them. I didn't get to do anything.
"J -with rolling eyes" Yes you did. You got to do the water and the packet and put them in the microwave. I didn't get to do anything.
Really, are there that many steps to make Ramen Noodles? I should have just made them myself. There wouldn't have been scrunched up noodles and flavor packet all over the kitchen. Why scrunch them? Isn't part of the fun of Ramen Noodles to eat a giant long noodle?
It's the little things that start the wars I guess. When do they go back to school?
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Brain Power
I can be cracked, Ican be made, I can be told, I can be played. What am I?
Last weeks answer-
They all do!
Last weeks answer-
They all do!
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Insanity?
So, apparently even though it is getting to be holiday time and there hoards of people coming to my house on Thanksgiving, I have NO Christmas shopping done and 5 kids with all kinds of things going on like plays, Christmas Concerts, sports, friends I am going to take on yet another venture! My friend Mary and I are working on starting something new together. It is exciting and overwhelming but fun! I'll keep you posted as things come along... but here is a hint- this has to do with one of my obsessions in life and making it profitable... yup, adding another business soon. I'll be posting a new link to see in the near future! Who needs some bling?
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
At least Some One Cleans...
Madaleine must want the floor cleaner for the food she store there for snacks! She spent a good 10 minutes playing with that toy! Now if I can get her to mop...
Monday, November 17, 2008
Our New Alarm Clock
We have a new way to be woken up in our house. It is a slug alarm... yes I said slug as in the slimy, squishy worm like creature. We have an alarm by our sump pumps that detect water so that we know if there is a problem. Well, lately the problem has been that slugs keep crawling on the alarm, complete the circuit and the alarm goes off. One morning at 5 am, 11 pm. Apparently slugs come out when people are sleeping. On the plus side, the time it went off at 5am, Louie actually didn't set his alarm and he needed to be up. So, we are faced with the decision of taking out the alarm and risking a basement flood or leaving it and facing getting woke up at bizarre times of the day. Why would a slug like this thing so much? I just don't get it!
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Sunday, November 9, 2008
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